All I wanted was a Pepsi. Just one Pepsi.

I'm very tired. I didn't get much sleep last night. It was Jeremy's last night in town so we were up late and we had to leave early to get to the airport. I'm sitting at my desk and fighting sleep. I've opted to take a carbonated nap.

11:11
I have my Pepsi on my desk. It’s too cold to drink right now. Plus I’m a little less tired because I got to get up to purchase said soda.

I’ve purchased the Pepsi on the recommendation of Clinton. His options were Coke and Pepsi.

11:18
Still too cold. Why are those machines kept at absolute zero?

11:54
Co-workers having a conference (not involving me) in my tiny cubicle. Tempted to drink still too-cold Pepsi.

12:15
The conference has ended. I’m more tired now. Pepsi still too cold to drink. How is this possible??

12:47
It’s like it’s in an invisible freezer. How is it still so frigid?

13:11
It’s still very cold. But I’m sleepy. That it’s so cold in my cubi isn’t helping. I’m drinking the Pepsi.

13:12
I’ve had my first swallow of Pepsi. It’s so incredibly sugar-y.

13:51
I’ve consumed about an ounce of the soda. I can’t tell if that is helping me stay alert or the episode of This American Life I’m listening to. Man, I love this show.

13:53
I had some water. It tasted … rounded? Not flat, but boring, for sure. Odd.

15:13
Maybe one more swallow of the Pepsi. I’m glad I got the smaller soda. I’ve been moving around more so that’s helping. And I have lots of work to do. And it’s my favorite part of the daily duties. I’m processing checks. No lie, I really like this part.

17:34
I made it through the day. I drank less than 1/10 of the soda. Next time I'm just going to drink more water instead.

Now all I need is postage

Dear Jerk,
I'm so glad you were able to finish off the milk I left in the office fridge. I now have a small container of organic raisin bran that was supposed to be mixed with the milk. Would you like that as well? I'll just leave it in the break room. I'm sure you'll go 'shopping' again soon and pick it up.

I'm glad we have the kind of relationship where we can just borrow/take from each other/just me without the formalities of asking. It's nice.

If you'd like I'll gladly give you the antidote you'll need for what I put in the milk just in case something like this were to happen.

Best wishes,
Jessie

I live in the dessert and it's winter

It's winter here in the valley. There is frost covering the fallen leaves and the still-green lawns. I really like this time of year. It's cold enough to wear my cute sweaters and lighter coats but not so cold I need to find my missing mitten. It's perfect.

I like that yard care (watering, mowing, weeding) slows down this time of year and gives way to raking leaves into piles of fun. Autumn rocks.

Today on my way to work I saw a business watering their lawn. Is it not October on that block?

Stepping out of 1985

Well, I finally made it on here. I hate not having the Internet at home. Hopefully that will be resolved soon. Very soon. Work has been too busy. Stupid work. I will try to be better, I promise.

Well, now that I have finally logged into Cyberspace, what to talk about it? I sit here on a sunny Sunday afternoon, crisp cool fall air, garlic on my breath, and ponder the meaning of life. Life? What meaning shall I give it? Life? Hmm.... Okay, this life pondering crap is BORING!!!

I stopped in to visit my parents and found my mom (we'll just call her Jazzie) has chipped her front tooth. She just got home from a business trip, and sadly she discovered the morning of her big presentation, a diagonal chip in her front tooth. I don't think anyone noticed. If they did, they didn't say anything. I must admit, I didn't notice it at first. But once i did, I couldn't stop looking at it! Every time she smiles and laughs, all i see is her big ole chipped tooth, staring at me and i can't help but have a little chuckle of my own. Awe....gotta love that Jazzie. Here's smilin' at you kid.

With little power comes imagined greater power

I speed. I do. If I'm not going ten over I'm not happy. I realize it's silly because it uses more gas and gets me to my destination maybe three minutes earlier.

The only place I never, ever speed is a school zone. I do it for the kids. I once saw on a 20/20 ish type show what it looks like when a car going just 35 miles per hour hits a card board kid. Not pretty. I usually go about 18, just to give myself a little cushion and the kids a little extra attention.

On my way to work I pass through just one school zone. It's a little annoying because I am always running late but I've never gone even 21 through there. Think of the children!

Today was no exception to any of those rules. I was going 18 and running late. About 20 feet from the END SCHOOL ZONE sign I sped up to 20. The crossing guard yelled at me to slow down.

She's lucky I was running late because if I had thought I could have made my train and still gone back there to give her a stern talking to I so would have. And then I would have given her a brownie so she wouldn't be dang ornery the rest of the day!

Public transportation strikes again

I have the best friends in the world. No one understands me like my closest friends. The seven of us grew up together. The last to join our club, Melissa, found us in ninth grade.

Of the group I've known Wendy the longest, then Candice. These two, more than any person in the world, get me. It's nice.

Just over a year ago Candice got married. And in April Wendy left to serve a full-time LDS mission in England.

Just before Wendy left she was dating Robert. I'm not sure where they left off when she left the country for 18 months. (I never really asked.)

Last night I took TRAX home after being down town late into the evening. I saw Robert on the train.

"Oh," I thought, "he's looking good. His hair is lots shorter now. And he's all clean shaven. Lots of books. I wonder what he's taking ... ... Married! He's married. How -- when -- ?? Wait, Jessie. Doesn't he have a brother? Yes, he does. A twin. Oh, good, a twin." I'd realized this after I'd had a small freak out and peed my pants just a little bit.

The first thing I did after I got off the train was call Candice. She, too, forgot that Robert has a twin. Which made me feel better.

While I was on the phone with Candice I realized had Wendy been home and that had been Robert, Candice would have still been my first phone call. I think bad news is always best when delivered by a red head.

Not every guy deserves a first date

Last weekend I was on the phone with Jeremy. We got to talking about old crushes and exes. I mentioned those I could remember. Since then those boys I've forgotten have been creeping up in my thoughts. Mostly while I'm on my way to work. Taking TRAX is nice because I don't have to worry about traffic but it also means I have time to let my thoughts wander. Today's grimace comes from my days working at the community center.

Years ago I worked at Copperview Community Center. It's in Midvale very near government housing. We got all kinds there.

Near the end of my days at Copperview there was a custodian named Toby. He was a twenty-something with long hair. He was nice and fun to talk to and we got along well. If we didn't work together I wouldn't have been friends with him but that's true of most people. (I'm not very out-going.)

Eventually Toby's friends started coming to visit him. This is to be expected when you work after all the supervisors go home. They never bothered me and were nice enough.

I got invited by one of them to go 'with the group' for coffee. It seemed harmless.

The chosen day rolled around and Toby wasn't at work. And only Dennis showed up. ...

I asked Dennis where everyone else was. He said it was just him and me. I'm sure my face said it all.

I don't play poker. I don't know how. Even if I did I would fail miserably. I don't have a 'poker face.' Honestly I haven't even made it to 'go fish face.' I'm sure Sally Struthers can help me get a degree in this but the practical application would still be impossible for me to master.

Needless to say the afternoon was off to a rocky start. We went to a bagel place on State and 5000 ish south. Over coffee (for him) and cocoa (for me) we quickly ran through the obvious topics.

I asked him how he met Toby. Turns out they met a while ago -- in prison. I'm sure I choked on my cocoa at this point.

"Really? What were you in for?"

He was in for forging checks from his employer. But he didn't go on a spending spree. He donated to non-profit organizations.

It wasn't a pleasant experience for me. But, as I dropped him off at the TRAX station (anyone surprised he doesn't have his own car?) he said he would love to get together again some time. I'd like to think I told him I didn't see this as a possibility but I think I stammered out, "Sure." I was focused on getting that little bald man with the one eye bigger than the other out of my car.

We never had that second date. It would have never worked out between us. I just don't like to drive.